the best deal

a friend, babz, once mentioned to me that falling in love, being head over heels in love, going out, seriously going out, living with someone or any one of the other kind of these things we do to ourselves over our teens and twenties might be fun and fulfilling when we dont know better but they all fall flat in the face of good marriage. Having married someone he obviously loves very much, he told us then that marriage is the best, the security of love that comes out of two good people coming together, who genuinely want a shot at making the best of life.

the words struck me then and these days they occasionally echo in my head, and i wonder if all the relationships i had in the past are now rendered useless just because i have found the person i want to spend the rest of my life with. didnt those connections, as temporary or as permanent as they may have been then make me who i am today? doesnt that wealth of experience contribute to making sure that today, i am who i am and in the larger schemem of things had all those things not happened to make me who i am...then i wouldnt have been with k today. so in effect all those experiences become more precious, changing shape, altering but always remaining a part of my integral makeup.