just the two of us
Being happy with your situation, i have realized, is a rare bird.
We always like the grass on the other side. Simply because it isn't ours.
These days its just the two of us. Mummy is in Isloo.
And I am the Princess turned Queen of the House. I have the accounts in a book. I have to pay salaries.
When the eggs finish and I have forgotten to get them ahead of time, I have to run out and get some. And then I wonder why do people want to live alone together? Having arrived from a family where chaos and support is part of our daily diet, this quiet existence starts resonating loudly in my head. Now I have Catu so coming back home has become entertaining. Atleast something alive and jumping greets you. Even if it is for food. I think back to my mom's house and the constant comings and goings of the entire family during the day and the silence becomes even louder. I put on music sometimes to dance in the room and it's funny because no one tells me to turn it down. I'm used to the conflict. Winning against no one isn't fun.
All wise women, married and otherwise stressed to me the importance of our time alone right after marriage. According to the most cynical of them, that is the one chance you get to make him yours. And according to the other 10 percent, thats the only time you will have to actually be with each other before life and inlaws take over. So as the fairytale goes, K and I are living happily-ever-after these days; feeling "married", doing household stuff together. We take turns feeding Catu, we cook dinner together, watch movies, have friends over. We dance all over the house. And we get to know each other. He hates adrak and lessun ki smell. I can't chop onions. He won't touch liver and I won't be left alone at home at night. He watches horror movies when I am away and I watch Indian movies when he is not home. And as we learn these essential details about each other, it doesn't matter if its just the two of us or if we are surrounded, because at the end, when the day is over and everyone has gone home, it is just the two of us after all.
We always like the grass on the other side. Simply because it isn't ours.
These days its just the two of us. Mummy is in Isloo.
And I am the Princess turned Queen of the House. I have the accounts in a book. I have to pay salaries.
When the eggs finish and I have forgotten to get them ahead of time, I have to run out and get some. And then I wonder why do people want to live alone together? Having arrived from a family where chaos and support is part of our daily diet, this quiet existence starts resonating loudly in my head. Now I have Catu so coming back home has become entertaining. Atleast something alive and jumping greets you. Even if it is for food. I think back to my mom's house and the constant comings and goings of the entire family during the day and the silence becomes even louder. I put on music sometimes to dance in the room and it's funny because no one tells me to turn it down. I'm used to the conflict. Winning against no one isn't fun.
All wise women, married and otherwise stressed to me the importance of our time alone right after marriage. According to the most cynical of them, that is the one chance you get to make him yours. And according to the other 10 percent, thats the only time you will have to actually be with each other before life and inlaws take over. So as the fairytale goes, K and I are living happily-ever-after these days; feeling "married", doing household stuff together. We take turns feeding Catu, we cook dinner together, watch movies, have friends over. We dance all over the house. And we get to know each other. He hates adrak and lessun ki smell. I can't chop onions. He won't touch liver and I won't be left alone at home at night. He watches horror movies when I am away and I watch Indian movies when he is not home. And as we learn these essential details about each other, it doesn't matter if its just the two of us or if we are surrounded, because at the end, when the day is over and everyone has gone home, it is just the two of us after all.
posted by jammie @ 11:00 PM
12 Comments:
At 11:54 PM,
NZH said…
that's so well said jammie..inspite of living with the inlaws - at the end of the day, after thing everyone has come and gone, everything has been said and done, it's only both of you, left to tango..enjoy the dance!
At 5:34 AM,
MT said…
hey jammie...
just came to ur blog today.. read it in bits & pieces.. found it quite informative coz i m also getting married in january... i think u r a designer of some sort.. saw the pic of ur bedroom, its really nice.. while reading ur posts, it seems that u enjoy doing ur room... can u suggest me some nice place to get my furniture from? some place which is good & not heavy on the pocket...
thanx
At 7:51 AM,
urbaNiche said…
jammies said it again...
in laws or no in laws at the end of the day it DOES come down to that...the 2 of u as ink says "left to tango..enjoy the dance!"
At 10:00 PM,
insiyasyed said…
when we were young [i am going 22 now! :p] - that one thing that always excited me about marriage was being able to do lots of things that you are otherwise not allowed to do! like going out and buying ovaltine to eat! :p ammi expects it to go in milk... eew! :p
and like always i'd say again: you make shaadi life sounds so much fun! :)
At 2:53 AM,
jammie said…
ink- i once wrote a blog called two to tango :)
mt- furniture is such a personal thing- i did mine using lots of catalogues- and a place in sabzi mandi called welcome furniture.
urbanniche- i can see married people agree :)
insiya- i think marriage can be lots of fun- i guess one just needs a sense of humour and some perspective. :)
At 1:24 PM,
StrivingSoul said…
Jammie
been reading u'r blog-very addictive. So far its been a beautiful story. Its refreshing to read what you write as other 'wives' I know don't paint the same picture you do - i'm left to wonder whose camp i'll end up - the ones like you or the others? I secretly pray its urs!!
At 10:20 PM,
N said…
Reading this post made me get an absolutely different perspective on marriage. I guess it's the anticipation, excitement, and the new happenings that each day brings that makes everyday worthwhile living. And after coming home from a rough day of work it truly would be nice to cuddle on the couch with a special someone and watch a movie. This was well said Jamie! :)
At 9:36 AM,
~meyum & a half~ said…
O beautifier of marriage and inspiration for getting married.!
imagine when one day when you guys are a lot older kids and stuff you will read all this:)wow!
At 2:48 PM,
BBCD said…
Mushallah :)
At 11:52 AM,
chili said…
hi jammie, where were you able to get a hold of that camera in the picture below?
At 9:23 PM,
M K Abbas said…
It just occured to me that you are a couple of months shy of your first anniversary. Time, it seems, is riding an F-16!
and as meyumsaid - K and U truly inspire others to look into this option.
Cheers to being an inspiration to all :D
At 10:40 PM,
jammie said…
me the camera belongs to me brother-in-law to be. hes a photographer- and for their engagement, i was the official phototaker. so i got to rub shoulders with the rich an dfamous of cameras :)
cocaine- you said it. I CANNOT BELIEVE its going to be a year. surreal/ and thanks you guys! keep praying for us.
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